Hidden Emotions
by dmiller5783
Summary: This is an alternate ending to season 3 episode 6 "Spellbound." Raven is having a hard time dealing with how the Dread Dragon Malchior manipulated her feelings and used her to escape the cursed book in her possession. Beastboy tries to comfort her. Also this is my first fanfic! So if you could leave a review and let me know if you want to hear what happens next or similar stories!


After raven defeated the dragon mage Malchior, who had tricked her into setting him free from a cursed book, she couldn't sleep. He put her through the most intense emotional turmoil she'd ever experienced.

It was a little after 4 in the morning and Beastboy couldn't sleep either. He didn't know if Raven was awake or not after what she just went through. But he wanted to check on her. So he made his way to her room. When he got there he gently knocked on Raven's door but loud enough to make his presence known.

"Raven?" Beastboy spoke softly, "It's me. I just wanted to say... I'm sorry."

To Beastboys surprise, Raven was still awake. His animal-like ears could hear her walking around her room.

Raven approached her door but stopped short with her head held low in a defeated depression.

"For what?" She replied, "You're not the one who-"

"No." Beastboy interrupted her, "I'm sorry that... he broke your heart."

Raven turned her back to the door and leaned against it tilting her head back, fighting hard not to show any emotion. "I know it was all a lie. But he was the first one who didn't make me feel... creepy. And don't try to tell me I'm not."

"Ok, fine." Beastboy said quickly, "you're way creepy. But that doesn't mean you have to stay locked in your room. You think you're alone raven but you're not."

Raven, still leaning against the door, begins to tremble as tears well up in her eyes. After a moment of silence Beastboy begins to speak again...

"Please don't think you have to hide from us. Me, Cyborg, Starfire and Robin... We all love-"

Beastboy couldn't finish as the door is flung open to see Raven spinning around towards him with tears streaming down her face. She uncontrollably throws her arms around Beastboy and sobs into his shoulder.

Beastboy is taken by surprise. He's never seen this level of emotion from raven. But it opens his eyes and it occurs to him just how much these past few weeks have affected her. Barley able to speak he whispers...

"Raven...?"

Beastboy slowly wraps his arms around her to comfort her. Raven, still crying, takes a step back but is unable to allow herself to look at Beastboy. She spoke with a straight, serious tone to hide her sadness even though it was perfectly visible on her face...

"Don't. Please don't. I thought for the first time someone actually cared about me for who I am. For everything about me. For all the things no one else could possibly ever love. I thought someone finally understood me. So please don't." She looks up at him, tears still on her face, with a seriousness Beastboy knew all to well from her. "Don't tell me you and the others love me. I know you can't. I know you don't accept all of me for who I am."

She lowered her head into his chest and continued to cry. She knew hiding the pain was pointless now.

Beastboy is shocked. He knew that Raven had her issues, but he never expected her to think the titans didn't care about her.

"Raven... how could you think that? We love-"

"DON'T!" Raven interrupted, raising her voice in anger.

Her outburst caused her to lose control of her powers which resulted in a surge of the electricity that blew out the lights around them. Somehow, Beastboy wasn't phased by it. He stood firm in the darkness as Raven cried into his chest.

After a few moments of scilence, Raven stepped back, wiped her tears and pulled herself together. She turned to walk back into her room. But even in the pitch black hallway of titans tower Beastboy reached out and grabbed her hand before she could get to the door.

"No!" He said agressively, "Raven you need to hear this..."

Raven didn't even turn her head. She stopped and stood still but looked as if she was still walking into her room. She calmly responded to avoid any further damage to the tower...

"Beastboy... I told you no. I can't take anymore lies. Especially not from you or the others."

"No.This isn't a lie or a trick, Raven. I can't speak for the others but I will speak for myself. And you need to listen to me right now... Please Rae?"

Raven heard the sincerity and urgency in his voice. She turned her head to the darkness of the hallway. Her eyes had adjusted to the dark but could only see his silhouette. She turned her head back, tugged her hand free, and paused in the dark.

In that moment Raven went deep into her own thoughts: he's not trying to comfort me anymore is he? What am I going to do? If he tells me to go, where am I gonna live? If he tells me I'm too dangerous to be around, then who could possibly accept me if not him? Maybe it's best. Maybe I need to get as far away as possible from all of them. For their sake.

She sighed, turned to face him, and braced herself for the worst but she kept a lingering hope that she could keep the closest thing she's ever had to friends.

Beastboy could tell she was facing him in the darkness, willing to hear what he had to say. But he didn't know where to begin... he spoke softly but couldn't figure out how to voice his thoughts.

"Rae... Um... I... uh..." Unable to find the words he lowered his head, "I can't."

Ravens heart sunk. She knew it. She knew no one could accept her for who she is. She lowered her head as well and started to turn to walk into her room.

"I understand," she said softly as she was turing to her room, "I'll pack my things and leave in the morn-"

Before she could finish Beastboy grabbed her by the wrist and spun her around to face him. He firmly grabbed her by the back of her neck and pushed his lips onto hers.

Raven fell into shock, embarrassment, happiness, and fear. An overwhelming mixture of emotions she's never felt before. She wanted to pull away but she's never had anyone kiss her so intimately before. She didn't know what to do for a moment but soon after, a blush filled her cheeks and her eyes shut as more tears welled up for reasons she didn't quite understand yet.

Beastboy gently pulled away from her. He knew now what he wanted to say...

"Rae..." He started again, "I can't. I can't live without you. I know I can't speak for the others but I know how I feel about you. And a life without you in it, isn't worth living."

Beastboy started to tremble as he closed his eyes imagining what it would be like without her. The thought was unbearable. The pain caused him to lower his head once again.

Ravens eyes opened to see Beastboys face clear as day as if the lights had been on this whole time. The hallway was still pitch black but she could somehow see everything. She could see the pain Beastboy was feeling as he explored his thoughts. He was serious. He meant every word. She had never imagined anyone would say anything like that to her. A smile crossed her face as she wiped the tears from her eyes.

"Beastboy... You really accept me? No matter how creepy I am?"

She stepped closer to him, only inches from his face.

"Rae..." he responded with his head still lowered, "I don't care if you were a dragon like the one we just fought. You have so much good in you despite everything you try to hide from us. And I..." Beastboy started to shake as his voice grew more and more nervous. "I..."

Raven was starting to understand. But she didn't want to jump to conclusions. However, she could feel the nervousness and raw emotion Beastboy was emitting like fireplace warming the room. She waited for Beastboy to finish but he seemed to have lost the words...

"Beastboy?" Raven was hoping she knew what Beastboy was going to say but she didn't want to force him into saying anything, "you don't have to say anymore if you don't want to. You've said plenty. You don't have to worry about me."

Beastboy felt his heart sink. Eyes still shut, he swallowed his pride and spoke up with confidence. "No. I said you need to hear what I have to say so I'm gonna say it."

Ravens heart started racing. The assertive confidence coming from him was extremely attractive to her and she's never seen it from Beastboy. After he kissed her and all the emotions that ran through her mind took her to a place of ecstasy she was beginning to understand what they meant.

She never knew she could feel this way about someone so close to her. The feeling that Malchior had given her before his betrayal was nothing in comparison to what she was feeling while she waited for Beastboy to say what she had been longing to hear so badly.

Beastboy stood up straight, took a deep breath and started again, "Raven... um... I... I love-"

As soon as raven heard it she grabbed beastboy by the back of his head and pulled herself into him kissing him passionately while pressing her body tightly against his. More tears started welling up in her eyes. But this time she knew exactly why. They were tears of joy. She felt she belonged with him. A sense of belonging she had never felt before in her life.

After a long moment Raven pulled away from him with a smile.

"I think I know what you're trying to say Beastboy," Raven said through her smile.

Beastboy, kind of taken back, felt his face go bright red. He takes a second to take everything in, opened his eyes, and looked at her.

Her eyes were glowing! Not dark energy like her powers usually gave off, but a gentle light that brought out the color in her eyes perfectly. They shined like beautiful Amethysts that lit up her entire face and beastboy could see the tears running down her cheeks. He reached up for her and took her face in his hand wiping a tear away with his thumb. Raven, still smiling, closed her eyes and allowed her face to fall into the comfort of his hand.

Beastboy felt no nervousness anymore, "I love you Rae."

The words came so naturally this time that he felt as if they should have been said years ago.

Raven fell into his arms as beastboy wrapped around her and held her tight. The sun began to rise from the window of Raven's room. They were both tired. It was nearly 5:30 in the morning now and they had not only fought an incredibly powerful dragon the night prior but Raven had also been emotionally drained from the events leading to that battle. She was so physically and mentally exhausted that she dosed off in the comfort she had found in Beastboy's arms. Beastboy picked her up and carried her to her bed. Laid her down on her side, covered her with the blankets and kissed her on the crown of her head before turning and heading to the door.

He turned one last time to see her fast asleep with that same smile on her face as the sunlight was starting to shine into her room. She looked at peace. A peace he had never seen from her. He smiled and whispered into her room...

"Sweet dreams Raven. I'll always love you."


End file.
